Sunday, January 2, 2011

New year, new start

30 seconds in to the new year... Its a lovely cool evening, I'm sitting on the balcony with a cup of tea, fireworks are going off over Bangkok, John McClain has just beaten the bad guys in nakatomi tower, and the Thais are singing and dancing down by the klong below me... It already feels like a great start to the year.

It's my 40th new year this year, which has been somewhat of a bench mark, far more of a mile stone than I ever believed it would be. I never really believed reaching 40 would be a problem for me, just didn't see the whole mid life crisis thing being something that would sneak up on me. Although I did not grow my hair (well, thats not strictly true, my hair is a little longer, as is my beard, but it's not in a pony tail), nor did I buy a tie dyed jimi Hendrix t shirt, a Harley davidson and get myself an 18 year old girlfriend, there is no denying it did have an effect.

I think the "mid life crisis" is possibly unavoidable, it just affects the individual in their own unique way. In all honesty how can we avoid reflecting on our lives at such a turning point. Society makes such a big deal of it, even if society didn't, there is no denying the mid way nature of the age, and so it is only natural to look back and reflect while considering where you are going with the next chapter. Why shouldn't we look back at what we feel we may have missed out on, or passed by and not want to rectify that for our futures, true, there are better ways to do that than get a Harley and grow your hair. I am not, after all, talking about trying to recapture ones youth, instead make the most of the time we have going forward, achieve those things we want in our lives. Whether they are things we desired from our younger lives or things that we have grown to realize are important. Either way there is nothing wrong with the reflection and the striving to make more of ourselves and get the most from our lives.

This is what I believe to be the true nature of the mid life crisis, like I say though some choose tie dyed t shirts, muscle motor cycles and girls fresh out of college... For me I want something a little more substantial and fulfilling, and if ever there was a turning point in your life to try and achieve those things, I can't think of better one than turning 40.

What do they say? life begins at 40? I'm not sure how true that is, almost seems like an insult to the 39 years before it. But I will say that at 40 you have certainly lived enough to have a better understanding of what it is you may want, yet may not have achieved or attained in life. And after 40 years i would hope, have the wisdom, the courage and the strength to go out and truly achieve it, whatever it may be.

So as I go in to 2011, with a great start to the year, I hope the things learnt during 2010 and the 39 years before, will give me strength and grounding enough to go forward and achieve some of those things, that my personal form of a mid life crisis highlighted, that I may not have or may not have yet achieved. Only the year ahead will tell, but if the first hour or so of 2011 is anything to go by, it seems off to a good start. John McClain is now taking an airport by storm, the Thais are still singing and dancing by the klong below me, and i've just finished my first blog update in quite some time... feels like it could be a good year already.

Till next time.